They are the ones that “didn’t deserve my music”
3 May 2008
It was 6:40 pm and 70% of the seats were taken.
I was very nervous and had terrible stress related stomach aches. I kept thinking that there is an increasing chance of losing the flight for Sibiu, as people were still entering the hall, and we were supposed to wait.
But we didn’t have time for that.
I stepped on the stage after the presenter had said my name and the crowd began applauding.
Before starting the show I took a look at the audience and saw some people who were eager for the concert to begin. Some of them waved at me when I looked at them and their gestures were the same ones that a child would make before receiving a nice gift. I was so surprised by the way they were looking at me that I shouted: “Some people said I shouldn’t be here and that you don’t deserve to hear my music! What do you think about that?”. It’s useless to talk about their reactions. Some of them got up from their seat and were absolutely frantic. It’s useless to say they moved me to tears. Who are WE, the “clever” ones, who pretend to hold the truth, and before seeing someone’s soul, place them next to criminals or people who don’t deserve anything from anybody? Who are we to suppose that the ones who listen to another kind of music, are ignorant? Who are we to assume that God would do exactly like us? I wanted to scream!
I felt like shouting to all that didn’t want me there, and tell them how wrong they were.
The moment I started to sing “ Timpul-la radio se anunta ploi” I saw happy people in the audience. I was watching everyone attentively and I saw that several young ladies knew the lyrics. My heart was laughing, after a tiresome fight with an entire world, my world. I remembered when someone was writing a text message on TV that said “if you go into the pigsty, you’ll be eaten by pigs”.
I was angry at this and, in the difficult fragments of “Timpul” I did some improvisations which a journalist told me that no one cares about. I was shivering: those people started applauding with frenzy. They understood!
The second song was “Ce bine ca esti”. I asked them to clap their hands in order to keep the rhythm because I needed their help, seeing that it was a piano and voice concert. They were very happy to do it. And, surprise: this “manele” loving audience sang “Ce bine ca esti, ce mirare ca sunt”! I told myself “God, thank You for all the joy you brought to me today! I hope I deserve it someday!”
They weren’t bothered by the fact that a cable was broken and my microphone stopped functioning. They sat there, quietly, waited for someone to repair it and, when that happened, they started applauding again. I allowed myself to finish the song on a high note and… I was again rewarded.
I wanted to memorize each one of them, take their image home with me, and when someone says that my music is too “elitist”, just take the photo out from my heart and show it to them.
Other moments of the show, the duet with Mr. Florin Salam and the show in Sibiu, I will tell you about tomorrow, now I’m tired after so much fighting.
